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Re: Dr. Bob's Jokes Thread
GhostRyder #685359 March 26th 2015 5:23 pm
Joined: Oct 2009
Posts: 3,772
pooh-bah
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Sherlock Holmes and Dr. Watson went on a camping trip. After a good meal and a bottle of wine, they lay down for the night, and went to sleep.

Some hours later, Holmes awoke and nudged his faithful friend.

"Watson, look up at the sky and tell me what you see."

Watson replied, "I see millions and millions of stars."

"What does that tell you?" Holmes asked.

Watson pondered for a minute:

"Astronomically, it tells me that there are millions of galaxies and potentially billions of planets. Astrologically, I observe that Saturn is in Leo. Horologically, I deduce that the time is approximately a quarter past three. Theologically, I can see that God is all-powerful and that we are small and insignificant. Meteorologically, I suspect that we will have a beautiful day tomorrow. What does it tell you?"

Holmes was silent for a minute, then spoke.

"Watson, you idiot. Somebody has stolen our tent!"


The only Stephentown on earth.
I don't mind Coming to work,
but that 8hr wait to go home is a bitch.
No matter how little I do,
I always feel I could do less.
"The only thing wrong with a perfect drive to work is that you
end up at work."
NOVA VANS
1990 Dodge B150
Re: Dr. Bob's Jokes Thread
GhostRyder #685375 March 26th 2015 8:45 pm
Joined: Sep 2013
Posts: 1,536
S
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Posts: 1,536
haha

Re: Dr. Bob's Jokes Thread
GhostRyder #685437 March 27th 2015 4:37 pm
Joined: Oct 2009
Posts: 3,772
pooh-bah
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Joined: Oct 2009
Posts: 3,772
A woman was rushed into the hospital in an ambulance as she was just about to give birth to twins.

At the hospital the lady was in such pain she had to be sedated.

A couple of hours after the babies had been delivered, she woke up and asked to see her children.

"Doctor, could you bring my babies to me so I can name them?"

The doctor replied, "You don't need to worry about names, your brother has already named them."

"Why did you let him name them, he has no sense! What did he call the little girl then?"

"Denise." replied the doctor.

"Oh that’s not too bad, I thought u were going to tell me he'd named her something awful! So what did he call the little boy?"

"De-nephew, of course!"


The only Stephentown on earth.
I don't mind Coming to work,
but that 8hr wait to go home is a bitch.
No matter how little I do,
I always feel I could do less.
"The only thing wrong with a perfect drive to work is that you
end up at work."
NOVA VANS
1990 Dodge B150
Re: Dr. Bob's Jokes Thread
GhostRyder #685438 March 27th 2015 4:46 pm
Joined: Aug 2008
Posts: 18,213
Likes: 2
Supreme Master
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Posts: 18,213
Likes: 2
lol


Everyday above ground is a Good Day!!!
Never Stop Vannin'

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At Shenandoah Acres Family Campground

Owner & Creator of Wizard's Van-In Videos
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Re: Dr. Bob's Jokes Thread
GhostRyder #685461 March 27th 2015 8:29 pm
Joined: Feb 2002
Posts: 32,696
Likes: 172
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Good one !


Jim & Lucy Newkirk
1965 Chevy Bad Influence
1981 Chevy-the Love Shack
2012 Chevy Van , 2020 chevy van
2020 Chevy van Sapphire Sweet.
Club Vannerz.
vanninvanner@comcast.net
Re: Dr. Bob's Jokes Thread
GhostRyder #685530 March 28th 2015 4:37 pm
Joined: Oct 2009
Posts: 3,772
pooh-bah
Offline
pooh-bah
Joined: Oct 2009
Posts: 3,772
A lady walked into a boutique and asked the sales lady "May I try on that cute dress in the window?"

The sales lady replied; "Sure, but wouldn’t you be more comfortable in a dressing room?"
==============================================================

A boy had reached four without giving up the habit of sucking his thumb, though his mother had tried everything from bribery to reasoning to painting it with lemon juice to discourage the habit.

Finally she tried threats, warning her son that, "If you don't stop sucking your thumb, your stomach is going to blow up like a balloon."

Later that day, walking in the park, mother and son saw a pregnant woman sitting on a bench.

The four-year-old considered her gravely for a minute, then spoke to her saying, "Uh-oh ... I know what you've been doing."



The only Stephentown on earth.
I don't mind Coming to work,
but that 8hr wait to go home is a bitch.
No matter how little I do,
I always feel I could do less.
"The only thing wrong with a perfect drive to work is that you
end up at work."
NOVA VANS
1990 Dodge B150
Re: Dr. Bob's Jokes Thread
GhostRyder #685536 March 28th 2015 7:27 pm
Joined: Sep 2013
Posts: 1,536
S
veteran
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S
Joined: Sep 2013
Posts: 1,536
laugh

Re: Dr. Bob's Jokes Thread
DrBob #685594 March 29th 2015 3:23 pm
Joined: Apr 2012
Posts: 420
addict
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Posts: 420
rofl

Re: Dr. Bob's Jokes Thread
GhostRyder #685597 March 29th 2015 3:33 pm
Joined: Apr 2012
Posts: 420
addict
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Joined: Apr 2012
Posts: 420
DINNER CONVERSATION

WOMAN...What would you do if i died? Would you get married again?

MEN...Definitely not!

WOMAN...Why not? dont you like being married?

MEN...of course i do.

WOMAN...then why wouldnt you remarry?

MEN...okay, id get married again.

WOMAN...you would? (with a hurtful look on her face)

MAN...(makes audible groan)

WOMAN...would you sleep with her on our bed?

MAN...where else would we sleep?

WOMAN...would you replace my picture with hers?

MAN...that would seem like the proper thing to do.

WOMAN...would she use my golf clubs?

MAN...No, shes left-handed.

WOMAN...(silence)

MAN....SHIT.

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